Rage Fantasies

Have you ever thought of killing another human being? Seriously thought about it, as a serious option? If you have, then please step away from the keyboard, pack you things, and hie ye hence to ye olde mental hospital, because you have a problem.

What I wish to discuss, nay ramble on about, is rage fantasies. Those daydreams (or waking anxiety-driven nightmares) in which you star as the avenging hero of the work staff, giving what-for to that individual that makes your life and the lives of others, miserable, like it's their job.

THIS is what's been hitting me in the brain pan for the last couple days. Not just at work either. And that scares me. I'll be driving along and WHAM! This fully-fledged rage fantasy of telling one of my co-workers / managers just what I (and everyone else in the store) think of her:

"GET YOUR FAT ASS OUT OF THE OFFICE AND DO SOME DAMN WORK!!!!"

This individual "manages" the store from her perch in the office, because she "has to do scheduling" or "has to do inventory." Last time I checked, a fast food restaurant's main goal was to serve food to customers, preferably fast and hot, with a smile on the employee's face. And to make sure that happens, don't you think the manager in charge of the floor should see it happening? Not that I begrudge her the time to do those other things. She should be allowed to do that, because they are a necessary component to a well run store (if she actually did those things competently...). HOWEVER, if what you're scheduled to do is run the floor, then DAMNIT RUN THE FLOOR!!! Don't go off to the office to take care of other things, because we, the workers and other managers, KNOW what you're really doing: hiding from the work and texting your friends and husband away from the prying eyes of everyone else. Of course, you'll suspend anyone else in a minute for "playing" with their phone (no, I've never been suspended for such activities, I actually have a legitimate excuse for keeping my phone on me, but several other people have been threatened with punishment).

The whole workplace is so screwed-up and bass-ackwards. Too many managers, first and foremost, and I'm one of them so I can actually speak to the issue. Our general manager, while a nice gal, has very few leadership skills, and little to no backbone. She's fired three people in the five years I worked for her: one for stealing, one for drug use, and one for overstepping their bounds ("Give me a promotion or I'll quit!" "Buh bye!") But she doesn't deal with disciplinary action very well. I shouldn't talk, I'm non-confrontational my own self, but how do you get to the position of GM without being able to discipline effectively?

Maybe it's just my own messed up perspective. More likely that. It doesn't stop the anger or frustration. And borderline anxiety attack level rages that come on. It's not that I freak out and start screaming at people, but my heart rate goes up, my eyes get big, and I can FEEL the chemical reactions in my body as if I WERE yelling at these people.

Goose frah bah indeed....